Swine flu. Run for my life!
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
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