I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
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