Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
