i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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