I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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