Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Everyone says I win the strip club
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
