Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize