Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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