using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
