just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Randomize
