we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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