Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You were trust falling into bushes
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
