that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize