"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
