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Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
