Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
