i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
