I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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