He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just forgot I was standing up.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Randomize
