Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
