I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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