I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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