just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
