so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
