considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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