I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
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