Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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