just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
