Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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