Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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