have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
True but thats because hes a fetus.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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