god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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