I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
