Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
