I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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