farters have to be the big spoon...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
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