I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize
