they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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