i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
