I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
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