If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
