What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I think I am morally bankrupt
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Randomize
