what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
