For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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