have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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