I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
