Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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