I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I could fuck to npr.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
