Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
