I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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