I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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